When should I be concerned?

Young children don’t tell us when something is wrong–they show us. As a parent, you are in the best position to recognize if there is a concern with your child. This page lists some of the “red flags” that might indicate that a mental health screening could be helpful for your child.

Don’t all children have a problem at some point?

All children have some kind of problems sooner or later. Some problems are short-lived and don’t require treatment. For example, the birth of a sibling may cause a child to temporarily act much younger. It is important to recognize such behavior changes, but also to differentiate them from signs of more serious problems. Problems that are severe, persistent, and impact daily activities should be brought to the attention of a professional.

• Most children are usually content and happy. If your child is irritable or unhappy most of the time, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Most children are flexible and can adapt to changes in their daily routines. If your child consistently has difficulty with changes to his or her routine, unrelated to a developmental phase, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Children will become frustrated as part of learning how to relate to others and new situations. If your child’s frustration level interferes with his or her ability to be successful during play and social interactions, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• All children have temper tantrums! If your child’s tantrums are so frequent or long-lasting and there seems to be no way to calm him or her, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Over time, children learn how to play well with others. If your child doesn’t interact with other children, has more difficulty cooperating during play than others, is more physically aggressive than others, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Typically, children do not have the same stressors as adults. If your child is more nervous than others, bites fingernails, rocks, flaps hands or displays any other type of repetitive actions, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Most children adjust quickly to their home environment and routine. If you child is extremely sensitive to loud noises, clothing, hygiene routines, food taste or textures, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Children vary in the amount of sleep that they need, but over time all children should be able to sleep through the night in their own bed. If your child is not able to fall asleep independently, unable to sleep through the night, has frequent night terrors or other sleep disturbance, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Energy levels vary from child to child. Most children seem to have more energy than their parents! If your child’s energy level prevents him or her from staying with a desired activity for even a short length of time, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

• Children go through phases of being extremely attached to their parents or primary caregivers. If your child seems unable to “grow-out” of that phase, is not able to play independently or is anxious in situations that should be familiar, you might want to take a closer look at his or her social emotional development.

What are some signals that my child might need help?

Some common warning signs according to age are: ¹

• Infants (ages of birth and 12 months)
  • Unusually difficult to soothe or console
  • Limited interest in things or people
  • Consistent strong reactions to touch, sounds or movement
  • Always fearful or on guard
  • Reacts strongly for no reason
  • Evidence of abuse or neglect
• Toddlers (ages 1 to 3 years)
  • Displays very little emotion
  • Unable to comfort or calm self
  • Limited interest in things or people
  • Does not turn to familiar adults for comfort and help
  • Has inconsistent sleep patterns
• Preschoolers (ages 4 and 5 years)
  • Challenging behaviors, such as aggressiveness, impulsiveness, tantrums, or self-endangerment
  • Feelings of sadness or inconsolable crying
  • Physical problems, like poor weight gain, slow growth, or constipation
  • Difficulty coping with conflict or change
  • Can’t get along with family or friends
  • Consistently prefers to not play with others or with toys
  • Goes with strangers easily
  • Hurts animals
  • Limited use of words to express feelings

What are some signs that I or another parent might need help?

As a parent, you are as an important player in your child’s mental health as your child is. Your own mental health is crucial!

You should consider accessing resources if you have a history of mental health challenges, substance abuse problems, or frequent moves without a strong network of friends and support.

In addition, you should explore service options if your child’s behavior has resulted in him or her being kicked out of childcare, or if it is creating stress in your marriage, your relationships, or your job. Seek help if you are overwhelmed by your child’s feelings or behaviors, or if you are unable to control your own frustration or anger.

What should I do if I suspect my child needs help?

If you suspect that your child has a mental health concern, visit the Where can I find help? page.

1. National Institutes of Health, Treatment of Children with Mental Disorders (back)